Brown layer

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Brown layer!  That doesn't sound very good does it?  This weekend, my husband and I attended our church's marriage retreat.  Paul and Susie Ulrickson were our speakers and they reminded us that being a couple takes some hard work.  We did exercises that helped us communicate feelings and come to a better understanding of each other.  At one point the term "Brown Layer" was introduced.
Paul explained it to be like

 the outer portion of an onion.  The stuff that we throw away.

 Often the first things that we begin to share with each other are much like this "Brown Layer"!  It was a great concept for me, since I often process verbally and don't always filter what is said.  It gave me permission to say, "I think that was "brown layer" let's start over!"

It is probably why in Scripture is tells us to be slow to speak and quick to listen!  We are to listen more than we speak!

I will try to put this into practice. My husband has already become used to the phrase "Brown Layer"

Father,

Help me to guard my tongue and choose wisely the words that I speak. Lord help me also to recognize when I say things that are "brown Layer and to own up to them. Give me quick ears and a slow tongue.

Jann