Did I just say that?

As soon as the words pushed past my teeth and I heard them out loud, I could not believe that I was the one saying those things! What we say can never be completely taken back.

In a moment our words have the ability to encourage, challenge, uplift, comfort, discourage, judge, pressure, belittle, anger or hurt.

Jokingly, I often say “my filter is broke”, but honestly I’m not disciplined enough in the control of my mouth. Unfortunately those who are closest to me can often be the ones that I hurt.

Yesterday was one of those days. A friend who I dearly love had just shared something sensitive with me. I should have known that she was in a tender spot but, somehow it didn’t connect to my sensitivity emotion.  Without thinking, in complete disregard to her feelings I said something that made her feel less than she is.

Here lies my problem. If someone was to ask me, “would you ever do something intentionally to hurt your friends in this way”? I would vehemently declare, “of course not, I love, cherish and value them. I want to build them up!”But the thing, the very thing that I do not want to do is often what I do.

I confess, I blew it, I’m at fault and I am grieved that I would allow my sin to hurt someone who I love.

I have asked forgiveness from my friend but words spoken can never be taken back and I have the regret that I was the one to impart pain to one of my friends.

Have you been here? Does your mouth run wild?

Set a guard over my mouth, LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips. Psalm 141:3

Lord, guard my mouth. Remind me that it’s not what goes into a man the defiles a man but what comes out of him. I confess to you that I have loose lips and your love and care for others is not always primary in my heart and in my mind. Thank you for bringing this to my attention. I pray that you would repair the damage that I have caused and remove any wedge that could be left behind. Will you fill in the gap Lord that I have created?

An Open Door

After a wonderful day at church worshiping together and really experiencing a fullness of the Spirit It was time to head home. I was a little tired when I came home. Walking in the house our dog spunky looked at me, “let me out” and so I went over and opened the door to our deck. Once again Spunky looked at me she really did not want to go where it was cold.

As I walked away leaving spunky sitting there looking at me, I realized that the the door was still open. It had never closed. “That’s weird”, I thought to myself. Walking  over to shut the door, I heard a wooshing sound. I began walking towards the sound. The door to the garage which I thought was shut was also wide open in the same way that the door to the deck was open. The odd thing was that it appeared to be held open, as if something was holding it open. As I went to shut the door I sensed a teachable moment.

Teachable moments are those times that God meets us in our every day life to remind us of His promises, instruct us in the way we should go or reveal to us something new.

I am he who opens the door what I open no man can shut. Revelation 3:8

It was a moment that I heard Jesus, “There are open doors coming, walk through them”.

Some would say, “coincidence”. I would say God uses the ordinary to instruct my heart and my mind. He reminds me that He is at work and I only need to watch him and join him.

I don’t know what those open doors are but my eyes are looking, my heart is ready and  I pray that my I would follow along as God uses teachable moments to lead and guide me.

What open doors is God giving you today?

• I new friendship
• an opportunity to serve
• holding your tongue
• Using your gifts
• Forgiveness
• New position or job
• Undeserved grace
• New ministry
• Healing
• New adventure

Maybe he’s giving you the open door to walk away from sin or to embrace your calling , to step out in faith, or an open door to share your faith with someone else.

I am reminded of The walls of Jericho coming tumbling down. God can open any door no matter how tough they appear. He is able to make a way when there seems to be no way!

Look and see and be utterly amazed, I will do things in your days that you would not believe even if you were told! 

I’m ready to walk through the doors that you open Lord!

I might be Grumbling!

I live in Michigan it should not be any surprise that it’s February and it’s snowing again! But this California girl is having a hard time with temperatures constantly below 30°.  Where is the warmth? Where is that walk outside feeling of warmth. When I look down at my arms they pasty white! Outside everything is white, the driveway, the yard, and the roads.  It’s as if I live in the land of Pleasantville. The movie where everything starts out in black and white. During November when we get a first dusting of snow, I’m kind of giddy with excitement because it’s new and fun.

As we get used to the snow something changes. Perhaps it loses its attraction and it’s novelty. I can feel myself begin to grumble, “stupid snow”.  Maybe it’s because I’m a teacher and when it gets too cold the kids do not go outside for recess. They have no way to burn off that excess energy. Fights increase at school, students are more angry, and frustrated. This also leads to frustrated teachers! We really need the snow to stop and the Sun to come back. I would also love for the daffodils to start to blooming, the grass to turn green, the trees begin budding and the birds singing! Oh spring where are you?

I know, I know I’m grumbling. Let’s just say I’m having a hard time.

As I write this it’s 8 degrees and snowing again, did I mention that? I hear a still small voice, “you sound like the Israelites”.  Ouch!

God freed the Israelites took them out of slavery and as they marched towards the promised land God gave them food in the form of manna. (Exodus 16) The Bible tells us in Numbers 11 that God supplied the manna for them but that after a year they began to grumble and complain again! Instead of looking at His provision they began to grumble.

Grumbling happens when we take our eyes off the Provider and put them on the provision! Our fragile spirits begin to grumble.

Be careful when these thoughts invade your spirit

It’s not what I want

It’s not good enough

I wish I had

Why doesn’t he?

This grumbler wants to say, “I’m sorry God”.  I am reminded that if I want to change, I need to look to the Provider.

You are

The great I am

The author and perfecter of our faith

The creator of the universe and we get to be in relationship with you

Healer, Jehovah, the God who sees me, you go before me, you are my rear guard, you always protect, you always hear, you are righteous and just, you are holy, there is none like you, we worship you, we praise you.

Who are we that you should think about us? We are but dust. You sent your one and only son to not only save us from our sins but to reconcile us so that we might have a relationship with you. You are slow to anger, gracious and kind.