I can empathize

Empathy, according to DR'S. Les and Leslie Parrott is the ability to get into your spouses skin, to understand where they are coming from.  The more you can see things from their perspective the better your communication will be. 


My husband and I are leading a discussion session with couples using this material from the Parrott's.  Last week we were instructed to take an assessment that helps you figure out if you use more of your head or your heart in your communication style. Take your own assessment here.


The goal is to become more of a balanced communicator. The Parrott's call it being an empathizer. This means that you will use both your head and your heart when communicating with your spouse.


 I was pretty excited to take the assessment.  I like these type of tests. I started answering the questions and soon discovered that I had to make some tough choices in this assessment.  Was I more like this, or this? When I was finished my results were broadcast on the bottom of the page. The assessment gives you 2 scores.  Your heart score and your head score.


When I looked at my scores I was shocked to discover that according to this test, I have very little heart! I had scored only 4 out of 15, in the heart category but had scored a huge amount in the thinking category. Apparently, I am strongly analytical!

It all began to make sense to me, "Oh that is why I just want the facts and not all of the emotional stuff. That is also why it is difficult for me to empathize with people.  I tend to lean toward fixing things for people then towards crying with them. 

There is so much to learn in this area for me. I will be working hard to become more of an empathizer in my marriage.What a blessing to know that God understands that we are a work in progress.  


I am trusting in this verse.

being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. Philippians 1:6

Father thank you that you know my frailties. Thank you that you are the great high priest who understands us. Show me how to make my marriage stronger by becoming a better communicator.